After experiencing several failed relationships, it’s a common trap to start to believe that there is something wrong with you, or you need to lower your standards. Neither of these is true! Don’t let the fear of being alone keep you from finding true happiness by accepting whatever comes along.
Each person you’ve dated in the past was meant to teach you a lesson and help you grow into a stronger person. Use your time when you’re single to look deeper into your past relationships and your own behavior so you can understand what went wrong and enter your next relationship from a happier and healthier place.
You’ve Fallen Into a Pattern
If your go-to move when you find yourself single is to attend the same bar as always, then you will find the same types of people. After you have been dating and in a few relationships, it’s all too easy to fall into a pattern. You tend to repeat the same actions and behaviors that you know worked for you in the past.
The problem with that is, you aren’t the same person you were in the past. And, those relationships didn’t work out, so it’s time to take a different approach. For a better relationship, reach out to the expert matchmaker DC. Expand your area where you look for a potential partner and be more discerning with the characteristics you prefer. You will be much happier with the results when you approach dating with a fresh perspective.
There are Unresolved Issues Beneath the Surface
Sometimes, a person can unconsciously choose a partner that they know isn’t good for them or won’t last. The reasons behind this are varied, although common themes are fear of abandonment, trust issues, and negative thought patterns.
Be honest and really look at what happened in the past. See if you can identify an underlying issue that you have pushed aside. If you believe this could be part of what is happening with you, consider speaking with a therapist or do some deep journaling. Find the source of this behavior so you can heal and release it.
You Don’t Really Know Your Type
As you grow and mature, your outlook on life has probably changed a lot. It stands to reason then, that the type of person you are looking for has also changed. Are you open to meeting someone that interests you and challenges you? Or, are you stuck on a certain type that you’ve carried in your mind for years? This can be an important part of realizing where you are going wrong. Stop looking for someone who checks your boxes on paper and interact with them in the moment to see if you click as a couple.
Expectations Are Skewed
It’s a good thing to have boundaries and expectations of the person you date. Certain behaviors and opinions are too extreme to overcome if you stand on opposite sides. Just don’t take it too far. No one can live up to the dream version you have in your head. Give the person a real chance to show you who they are. Let the relationship grow and develop within focusing on perfection or meeting milestones within a set timeframe.
You No Longer Put Forth Effort
Dating means putting your best self out there, even when it gets tiresome to go on your third, first date in a week. Take a look at your recent dating strategy. Are you still making an effort? Do you pay attention to your appearance, listen attentively, and add interest to the conversation? If not, then it’s time to change that. You have to hold yourself to the same standard that you expect from others.
Relationships can be tough. There’s no denying that. However, the deep meaning and satisfaction that the right partner can bring to your life are well worth the time and effort it takes to find him or her. Once you change your mindset for the better and accept that you are a wonderful person who deserves love, it may just find you sooner than you expected.